What makes someone feel "rich enough" in different societies?

The only real security is having ability to earn some people who would stand by you till your end.”

I assured her I know. I grew up with my grandmother.

She is rich enough? Happy? You decide.

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I understood, she is about to put Rangavalli. I went out and offered to put. By seeing me she has her doubts like ‘do I really know drawing Rangavalli?

‘Then do you know what these neighbours said? “ She asked me with with an happy face.

Later I asked her, is this her daily life?

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grand ma said, ‘’Sundarama, (that woman’s name ) Today my grand daughter and her friends came. Take this buttermilk with you as usual but bring back some thick curds.

Since I ate stomach full breakfast I said I would come with her. Others are exploring the house, trees, fruits, well, etc.

I said Maamma garu!! there are so many facilities in towns and cities why can't she stay with one of her children or with all the children on rotation. More comfortable life that will be, isn't it?

Why am I totally different than others? Why do I have a problem with my basic knowledge about society and reality? Why am I dumb and stupid?

‘Maamma garu!! We can not fill your loss. Can not replace your children but if you decide to stay here we promise, we will take care of you like your own children.” they said.

New place..I couldn't sleep. Especially on mats!! we are some 10 girls. All of us wanted to stay in the same room. Very big rooms those are. But, given mats since there were not that many mattresses.

6 feet height compound wall. A roofed wooden door to enter the house. Kept two flowers to that outside door also at both sides.

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She said, “I can. “But, what should I do there? My skills are of no use there.

But, who is alive here to know others welfare !!!?? Mortgaged future, work load that blurrs difference between day and night swallowed lives here long back. Just left us alive for name sake.

Asking Grand ma about some thing and Grand maa was advising them. They left keeping their things there for drying. Evening they will come and collect.

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I am not even school educated. Just metric pass that too privately. Can't enjoy that busy life there.

Brought out two small lamps and kept them both sides of the house’s main door. Kept open the wooden door of compound wall. That door itself was like a small covered Typical coastal area style.

‘ I know , without any intimation to you when she brought all of us here , itself I understood her. But, she is good hearted “I said looking at my friend who is busy making swings with coir rope!!

Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support. I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized. he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that. he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened. he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence. i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction. after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly. things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it. we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe … our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far? this has upset me so much its hard to even function.

She smiled and said. “Since I live alone, it's to tell other neighbours I am fine. I got up. Those flowers and Rangavalli convey that message. Otherwise they will be worried and leave their work to find out how I am.

Some rice and vegetables, daal also They prepared for lunch. Every thing is done by 11.30. in the morning.

All may not understand this and whoever can understand this don't care for others acceptance at all.

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That women made rounds around front and back yard. Already lots of different , different birds landed there and enjoying their morning feed served by grand ma.

But, she told them her farm produce is more than enough for her.

Grand maa was doing namaskar to the main door of the compound wall. Started sweeping in front of the compound wall. Already finished sweeping the front yard. Spraying water with mug. A fragile appreaing strong lady.

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I asked her, in side the house it's ok atleast. Why out side of compound wall? Those flowers and all?

There was a small room next to the well. May be changing room. After bath She changed in to dry clothes there. Rinsed the wet clothes and put them on clothes line. While chanting something throwing some grains here and there in between small plants and under the coconut trees.

She said when asked ,grown up buds she collected at night itself. Morning time lot of insects will be there on plants. Before sun she should not disturb them!! It's against ‘prakriti niyama.” rules of nature. After sun comes only we should pluck flowers butnit will be too late for her.

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May not be suitable for present day cities.

Her grandmother stays there alone in that big house. She was aged around 80 years or late 70’s I think.

I was hungry like a pig. 10 kms to and from walk.

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I peeped first through window.

If money is hope for independence you will never have it. “Lakshmi is chanchalam’. It may come and go like water in coconut.

‘’What did you answer? I asked her again.

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She replied with a smile. “You just ask like my second granddaughter. This girl, your class mate is still a child only. Prasuna is younger to her but very matured.”

Grand maa said smiling. “God blessed me with enough, I can afford to give them.”

Long post.

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Already few women were waiting for her there. Tthuk!! tthuck.. she walked in to the fields, checked the soil and gave advice. Inspected seeds of those gourds.

Straight away we walked atleast 5 kms unde r sun. I gasped and stopped for few seconds in between. She didn't. Finally we reached much to my happiness.

She started churning the curds for butter. I asked her. She is alone. How much butter and ghee she needs!!?

I have not seen her plucking them.

I laughed in my heart. Too late? What she is going to do in the entire day at her age?

She smiled but didn't reply. Took little butter in to a small silver Bowl and kept that infront of lord Krishna's photo. Kept some ‘’Mandaram 🌺 flowers “.

Said around 5′ in the evening she will visit few lemon trees in the back yard and pick up fallen fruits.Interested can go with her.

I kept blank face.

All this farm experience I learnt from my husband. Two years back he passed away.

By the time I turned around to look for her,

The real measure of your wealth is how much you’d be worth if you lost all your money.

More than fifty years I stayed here in this house. Let me go off from here. Kids force sometimes. But, let me see!

It's an ancestral house with mud tiles. ‘’Manduva house” we call in our language.

Sundarama said, it's for farm labourers. Butter is made in to ghee and given to pregnant women and toddlers. Grandma has two buffalos in the farm. But, don't sell milk and other things.

She said yes. in her teens she got married. Her husband is a big farmer in that village. They have lot of lands but for children ‘s education, for marriages they sold major part of it.

They kept so many things for drying on that cemented floor.

Then to my surprise a group of women came. A portion of the front yard was cemented around Tulasi kota.

In fact all our villages have only those types of houses at that time. Very rarely you find cement roofed ones.

Lit lamp near ‘’Tulasi kota’’. Visible to people passing non road.

Suddenly I remembered my dad's words.

Two days stay it was.

After, some time, exactly at sunrise time, a woman came to help her. I thought, she might have called her since we are too many to feed. She brought fresh milk almost may be 4 to five litres. This much for grand Ma? I wondered.

My friend stays with her parents in a small town because of schol and college for her and her brother. Just Like all of us.

She was already taking her leisurely bath near well. Drawing water with bucket from well. With Cold water in November!! Chanting ‘shiva! shiva!. Something.

I was curious what she will do by getting up so early? She got up because not us or its her routine? I started keenly observing her.

She said lying on one mat. Let me take rest for one or two hours. Then we will go at evening to the lemon trees!

Straight away she went to her puja room. Finished her puja within minutes.

Just like that she took all of us there. No particular reason. Since it's not very far our parents also agreed.

Ok. Let me come back .

I asked Sundarama “what you will do with that much butter milk?

Early morning 4'. Clock. Some water sounds and some chanting, some karrr, karrrr sounds I heard..

The richness of life is not having money, having more memories which makes our heart happy. Having less nightmares and painful memories is richness of life. I have good memories which stops me going anywhere.

I said , I can't anymore and fell on my mat.

Formal education will make you earn a good living. No doubt in that. But, knowledge gained out of experience, self education will make you a fortune , lucky.

Around 3′clock we came back. I was served two coconuts in between.

I ate as if I never saw food in my life. She neatly cut a papaya fruit and ate, poha mixed with curds she took.

She said, “what you are seeing is a fraction of the land which we had once. I kept this for me and gave away everything to the children and that temple.

Some other farmers are stopping and greeting her in between, chatting for some time and going to attend their work. The entire land to the extent our eyes can see is full of farm land only with different crops.

The lamp in front of Tulasi in front yard, flowers and Rangavalli not only calm mind with divinity, conveys some message also. Like all is well with me to day!!

Around 8′clock another woman came called Parvati and started making some breakfast for all of us. Some upma and moong daal halwa. Served on banana leaves.

She told her children she wants an equal share and kept her share of farm land. Children sold their shares and settled in the cities of their choice..in between they come and visit her. They are even ready to send money whenever she needs.

I said, “Mamma garu! You have enough for your survival and independent life so, easily you said you can live alone . Away from children. All are not that lucky at your age to live an independent like like you. Even health wise.

Cut vegetables and gave her. Both sat drinking coffee chit chatting. Later that woman cleaned the house, mopped it. Washed grandmother’s saree with detergent and again spread it on the cloth line.

That village is around 30 kms from the town where we all stay.

That lady plucked some vegetables. Roasted some sweet potatos on coal stove.

Grandma ate food early and said she has some work and would come back after some time.

I asked her, are you happy? You feel contented?

How simple but powerful way of telling something about their welfare to neighbours!!

She gave me the powder bowl and showed the places where and all to put. I completed my task.

All those lands are tilled and kept ready . Bottle gourd, and other gourds are grown there. Separately on one piece of land betel leaves are grown on long thin trunks of trees.

She replied with a smile. ‘’Ammalu!( Dear).in this world there is no permanent happiness, richness, sadness or poverty. It's purely depends on how you want to look at it.

I have seen good crop days, lot of money in hands , sudden rains, crop loss, children growing up, leaving this place one by one, husband leaving this world, many friends of my age I lost, many young women become friends also.

Cut few more papaya fruits for our gang.

My friend took me to a place once. It's her grandmother ‘s house. Me and other friends as well.

Moreover they can relax from their stressful life if they come here than making my life stressful there.In between I do visit them anyway.

They have to buy everything there. Little leftovers also they keep it and eat next day. Here, nothing is left. Many people come and take away if I say one word. I can feed whatever amount I want to neighbours, temples, kids like you and all.